Are You Abandoning Yourself?

We know all the buzzwords: self-love and self-care. They’ve become viral in our world and are often just a gimmick to sell us more face masks, workout clothes, and self-help books. But how do we get there? What is the trigger that causes us to need more self-love? Once we understand the concept, shouldn’t it be as easy as following daily rituals?

The Road to Self Abandonment

It starts slowly, maybe with a small favor from a friend, but you feel the pit rise as the last words leave their mouth. ‘Could you do this for me?’ You know deep down you don’t want to but due to the overwhelming obligation to be good, to people please, and to make sure that others are doing well, you oblige and that is your first step down the path of self-abandonment.

Once you’ve made it clear that there are rules for self-abandonment it because easier and easier for people to push your boundaries, to fail to speak up for yourself, to avoid problems that could be fixed. Like a credit card bill that goes unpaid, Self-Abandonment is the leader of taking your morals, confidence, and values to collections until they reach a point that inhibits you from going any further in your life.

The Sense of Self That Could Withstand a Storm

The greatest gift that you can ever give yourself is developing a strong sense-of-self. What do you want? What are you living for? What are the pillars that you stand on? Why is your time, your life, your mind, your work, your love so important and so valuable? This is the first step at becoming someone who doesn’t abandon themselves.

When those moments come to test you, and they will, ask yourself: Am I abandoning myself?

Are you a freelancer whose been asked to lower your rates? Are you in a relationship and asked to take a next step that you’re not ready for? Have you been talking about starting that business for a decade and yet, you can’t seem to take the first step to make your idea a reality?

We all reach a point where the cost of staying small outweighs the risks of being who we are. Every time that you don’t speak up, ask yourself: Am I abandoning myself/ Is this worth it?

There is no self-love when you’re willing to abandon your self. If you know what you want for your life, stop avoiding, stop conforming, and stop bending when it’s time to stand confidently in who you are.